Two Emotions

I recently experienced two incredible emotions that are vying for my attention. A good way I can get back to healthiness is to express these emotions with my best effort and not hold it inside anymore. I've chosen to explain it as follows:

It is love. It is a small word, but it can present in different ways and have many consonants and vowels. It is amazing, powerful, and forever.

It's the time on our couch at night sharing movies together. It's his cooking and it's my dish washing. It's both of these and just the intimate time we've spent with each other on these occasions.

It is simply knowing he is there when I come home at night. It is taking the dog for his walk each evening and sharing stories of nothing and everything with each other on the stroll around the neighborhood.

It's the warm thoughts in the cold times when he's not sitting there with me. It's the cool caress when he's feeling sick with a fever and I can help him. It's knowing we're always there for each other.

It's talking nonsense and not worrying if I will be judged. It's alright and he understands and it's OK. It is the excitement of sharing the news of the day. We could share it with anyone but it just wouldn't be the same. Wait until you hear about what happened today…

It's not holding hands when we are together, but still knowing we are both very connected. It's the song on the radio that confirms that we are indeed of a connection. Those melodies on the FM station pour forth in tough times that say It's Your Love that lets me know It's (Not) The End of The World as We Know It.

It's the passion of living with each other amid even all the thrilling changes. It's watching the beauty of nature with its lightning and thunder in the big storm that holds us both speechless and captivated. It's at a time together like this when we know no words to speak and yet we have all the answers.

It's the wind and hail and rain that come in such a monsoon fury. It seems just minutes ago that I was in such a safe place. I am tossed around in these winds of confusion.

It's quite frightening and I'm aware a stranger has entered our home. This is not at all what I expected. It's cold, damp, and the fire has been extinguished. I can't stay warm and it's causing me to shiver.

It's really likely to be a mistake because it doesn't make sense. With a thud it has gone from May to December. It's evident I no longer have my blanket. I'm on my own.

It's not that I don't try to reach out for his help. I do. It's just that he isn't extending his hand to bring me to safety. He is yelling at me but I can't understand anything at this point. It's eerie and the sound on the radio has turned to white noise.

It is amazing, powerful, and forever. It has presented itself to me with its five consonants and three vowels and it is a big word. It is betrayal.

This article of soon to be wellness is brought to you by that guy with his broken heart. That abandoned guy is Ron Blake and he can be found building his happiness back one day at a time at rblake5551@hotmail.com.